Stupid technology. The desktop at my dad's house is broked, so I am missing a few quotes. Harvest Moon on my super nintendo—yeah, it works, biznitches— has ADD and erased the files on it. Gah! I was in fall too! I finished my summer reading: go me! Well, that's not necessary. I finished all the summer reading that is worth doing. Don't read The Jungle. It's slow and boring as hell, and quite frankly, watching paint dry is more entertaining. Speaking of which, I wonder how the paintjob on my new castle stronghold is coming. You can't just those lowerminions to pick out the right shade of grey, you know.
Title Source: "Black Dog" - Led Zeppelin. Go Zeppelin!
“What do you think the chances of me dancing on tables when I’m drunk are?”
“Very good, I’d guess.”
Pirates>ninjas>clerks
“Is it bad to belch in front of little children?”
“I don’t know. Maybe.”
“And will I go to hell for giving a kid the finger? He didn’t see it.”
“If he didn’t see it, then no.”
Ing= incredibly nasty goblin
“I’m probably going to call that kid Damien one of these days, I swear.”
[laughs] “And no one will get it.”
“Probably later when he’s a grown up shit, he’ll stop and think… HEY!”
“It’s like, [dude], you are not getting any bitches or hos, you are not a pimp, and you couldn’t rap a Christmas present. So please stop.”
“maybe you can contribute to the save a Bovo project. For only 60 cents a day you can make poor misguided teens like Rocco” *Rocco flashes gang signs* “into...well...not what he is now, maybe a lawyer, corporate executive...a guy who aspires to work at burger king. A guy with a chance to not be shot in a drive by shooting by real thugs.”
“I would quote this, but we might get our asses shot.”
“Well then, how about 1800 STOP NOW.”
“Yeah, that scene in The Jungle was really graphic. I was glad I had fish for dinner that night.”
“It’s like, ‘Ceri, we have pork!’”
“I probably would have stared at it. ‘Ceri, why aren’t you eating?’ ‘Do you have ANY idea how this shit is made?!’”
“’The screaming of pigs’? I mean, how would you like it if you were strung up by your leg, had your throat slit, and were slowly disemboweled? Like what they did in Braveheart. FREEDOM!”
[About the “Music is my boyfriend” icon] “So when can I meet music? Is he hot?”
[laughs] “You know it. Music is god.”
“The sex must be good.”
“You have NO idea.”
“Or they eat it off you.” [shrug] “Whatever floats your boat.”
“Then I think he needs to meet my friend.”
“They’d get along?”
“Maybe. My friend The Staff of Whacking.”
“I see. He seems friendly.”
“Oh yes, very personable.”
“Related to the polenta stick?”
“Great-grandson thereof. And his cousin the Ninja Board. He lives down in the Scene Shop.”
“So, I have brain-dead moments and that was… um… huh… who are you?”
“The love of your life.”
“Oh right, you.”
“The chances of us meeting are about as slim as Conor is tall…. Actually, they’re about as slim as Conor as well.”
“I’d rather watch paint dry. At least that way, my mind can wander in peace.”
“It is nice. Touching… nonsensical, but nice.”
“Genuinely touching or am I going to want to throw up all over the book?”
“If I had a pet owl, I would name it Yoyo.”
“I have a vagina, so I get priority, you bastard.”
“That comment makes her sound like an angry pregnant woman.”
“Cadet? Who are you calling cadet? Psh. I direct thousands of hoards of evil minions.”
“I’m sorry, oh great one.”
“Alright, fine. You are an angry, pregnant, garble-mouthed lady.”
“Cunt.”
“That one too.”
“I wanted to feel included.”
“I forgot that one.”
“But you have one.”
“I do. Thank you for telling me.”
“That would be fun.”
“Beating up middle ages white women in the Y? Yeah it would.”
“in the meanwhile...: step lightly, smile confidently, tread warily, move gracefully, bend softly, lift reverently, observe carefully, follow knowingly, dip thoughtfully, fall gently, hold regularly, merge willingly, swap occasionally, shift rhythmically, twist brilliantly, sway intuitively, hesitate rarely, connect beautifully, release frequently, and understand perfectly.”
“Fight for your right to cuss the shit out’a people.”
“Do the hustle… bitch!”
“Fare the well.”
“That reminds me, I need headphones. Big ones. Deaf to the world ones.”
"Shattered dreams of rock and roll stardom, pulled together and thrown into the ocean by THE Jimi Hendrix."
"Why isn't Jay dealing drugs? Why isn't he the whacked out crazy cool druggie we've come to know and love?! Why is he...!? GAH I can't even say it!’
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