Gah. Today was the first day of classes, and I'm TIRED. Some of my teachers are really cool, but some of them are crazy. In the bad way. I'm not looking forward to AP History. I really don't like History, and the AP makes it that much worse. I'll keep you posted on my killin-it-ness.
Title Source: "Attack" by 30 Seconds to Mars. I've become addicted to this album. It's like heroin for my eardrums.
“Do you realise we’re talking about my dishwasher?”
“Yeah I know. What else should we talk about?”
“I don’t know. My dishwasher is pretty much the most interesting thing in the world.”
“A microcosm of civilization itself.”
“Bachelor #3, I don't like bachelor #2 because on our first date, he's going to kiss other men.”
“I quote people. You obviously missed the memo.”
“Chivalry is dead. We should have a funeral for it with knights and dress up in gowns. It will be a proper burial.”
“Because when I think Annie, I think fly.”
“Of course your do. I’m a bird, baby. Ew, but not in the Nelly Furtado way.” [shudder]
“What does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella for?”
“…What?”
“For drizzle!”
“I think he looks like Spock in the alternate universe episode.”
“The CIA actually used vampire mythology to fight Philippine communist groups in the 70s. They'd capture guerillas, drain their blood, leave them to be found, and then spread rumors about Aswang (Philippine vampires) attacking communists.”
“Mutant grass or crappy concrete: you choose.”
“The world is my male whore house. I mean oyster.”
“You look like Ceri, and Ceri is cool.”
“No prob.”
“Bob.”
“Steve?”
“Joe?”
“Hey, there’s Madison.”
“Guilty shmilty, eat the damn cookie.”
“My mind yesterday was, like… filter-process-sex.”
“So what are you writing?”
“A story.”
“I’m guessing it excludes unicorns and PCP.”
“I wish I had a unicorn. Then I could skewer my enemies on impact.”
“You call thinking big blonde pussies are hot not sad?!?!”
“…Think about that statement.”
“I bet you were badass when you were younger. Be all like… Y7, fuck that.”
“Yes, I’ve established your church. Our policy: be wicked awesome and sacrifice the unworthy. Thus sayeth the Ceri.”
“Actually considering SI, the Starbucks change makes more sense, which is saddening.”
“Starbucks is evil. But I can’t exactly be stubborn just because I am against the uniformization of our youth by corporate America.”
“You can no longer be a Cassandra; now you instead be a satirical, vengeful observer.”
“I doubt any of them will reconsider. That stuff is mind control.”
“Items set in ‘Me’ generally have trait ‘good.’”
“If Ryan Ross were a bass [guitar], this would be it.”
“That’s one sexy fish.”
“If fish could be sexy, Ryan’s would be.”
“I wonder how you’re going to react when you’re having sex, when you laugh in the guy’s face.”
“If he’s a keeper, he’ll already know and laugh about it and or think it’s cute slash endearing.”
“I’m sorry, did I miss a chuck of my life when we dated?”
“There’s not a smiley that expresses my ‘what the fuck are you on’ look.”
“I think there’s something in my water.”
“Does it wriggle?”
“No, but it makes me feel like I can fly.”
“So you’re telling me that inside you’re a tall, hot gay man who’s in love with Brendon Urie?”
“More or less.”
“Nice.”
“So once upon a time, the Yosemite Group comprised of Anne Marie, her cousins, her aunts, her uncles, grandmother, grandfather, brothers, parents, great uncles, random old peoples, and a family taht is friends of the entire group, were in Yosemite. the children and a few parents were on the bus to head back from happy isles back to housekeeping. However, a travesty occurred! The bus was quite overflowing with many a smelly and/or good looking passenger, The little ones were forced to spread themselves out and find whatever seat they may. Katie sat in the front, jeffrey and monica near the middle, annie and kimmy in the middle back, and david, kevin, and jack in the backmost seat. the children decided to cheer up the grumbling parents and started to spread the message of "Increase the peace!!" annie heard her cousins yelling such a joyous phrase and wanted in on the fun. however, soon it was very quiet
the perfect opportunity! she thought. everyone can hear my happy proclamation! and the exuberant little child shouted "INCREASE THE PEACE!!!!" [silence] and from the front of the bus, each passenger heard a muffled phrase uttered by none other than her cousin Katie. it was "annie... no." the end
“I amaze myself. Or at least that’s what a shirt said at Walmart.”
“But of course you knew that, you omniscient, blind, dyslexic kids, you!”
“Banana, I love you.”
“Who doesn’t?”
“Dumb assholey people. People who have no taste.”
“That’s a shame, since I’m so delicious.”
“Annie-haters?”
“Ew, who are they? How can they live and be okay with it? Ya know, sometimes I just wonder. Some people just suck. How could God ever let that happen? Our poor world…”
“I’m so witty is why. Wit wit wit.”
“Tuesdays with Annie. Who cares about Morrie? Fuck him.”
“There was an ad taped to my cousins door today. it said something like "I’M GOOD HOUSE CLEANER. I’M ALSO A CITIZEN. CONTACT IF YOU WANT ME TO CLEAN YOUR HOUSE”. There was no name or number.”
“You’re strange.”
“What else is new?”
“Your face. My CD.”
“What about your cd?”
“It’s new. Like your face.”
“Goodnight, fair maiden! May the sun never redden your face with burnage and the scissors never cut your hair of beauty!”
“That’s so funny, I think I’m gonna hurt something laughing.”
“You… wrap up in your HIM blanket and dream about Brendon Urie. I’m going to bed.”
“Look! A bird!” [points] “Does anyone have a knife?”
“Ian, you’re missing the bird porn!”
“Ha! It happened! Screw you, logic!”
“Hell. Go to it.”
“It’s like an orgy in here.”
“You’re getting quoted. It’s like getting Punk’d, only better.”
“Swinging long jump should be an Olympic sport.”
“Push me and I’ll eat you.”
“Yeah, hard combo. Eggs and being lazy. That’s why you get married. But that’s a secret so don’t tell.”
“Well, you know eggs and Ceri is the best food combo in the world.”
“Boys are like slinkies: useless but fun to watch fall down stairs.”
“You’re no. Lots of no.”
“Tony Stark is a drunk doucheface.”
“In a few years, you’ll give Criss Angel a run for his money.”
“Borderline Hobo. That should be my club, and the extensions are Borderline Druggie and Sluttie, too.”
25 August 2006
18 August 2006
Are you down for giving up?
Hey kids. This has been a slow week for fun, though today I did make fun of people's clothes and watch Sponge Bob with my brother. Good times, and more to come later: movie night. Rock on.
Title Source: “Run Mary Run” by the Sloppy Meateaters. Cool guys from Georgia, and yes, it is a sexual reference.
“All the cute guys are either gay, short, 25, or taken.”
“It doesn’t get any better.”
“Then I’m becoming a lesbian.”
“My nails match my underwear.”
“Lawn clippings: the ecologically reusable garnish less expensive than parsley.”
“The cranes are courting.”
“So they’re fucking?”
“No! You court before you fuck. Unlike you.”
“I will shoot you... like an old horse... and make you into glue.”
“Who wants pity from [her]? If you did, I’d shoot you like a lame horse. Then I’d sell your hooves to the glue factory and sell your body to the dog food factory.”
“It was the Eighties. Everyone looked the same. Just like in the Fifties.”
“Run! Annie’s an alien assault vector!”
[laughs] “Of cheerfulness?”
“Of cheerfulness which is actually Ebola that takes over your mind and makes it alien also with low frequency vibrations and black holes and then augments your body with machinery and makes you bisexual. There, I have summed up every issue of Warren Ellis' global frequency for you.”
“Three isn’t many and six isn’t convincing.”
“Meh-el! Save your planet!”
“Shut up. Don’t make fun of the blind dyslexic kid.”
“Aww, why not?”
“Because it’s not nice. But apparently my telepathy is getting better because you understood what I said.”
“Squirrel! Evil! Kill it!”
“No! Cute! Kill it!”
“When I get my own place, I’ll be able to play music and laugh as loud as I want without people being annoying.”
“That will rock”
“Literally.” … “Another thing about my own place: I can fucking sing in it.”
“So did you vomit?”
“No, but I still feel like I should. Except then people will try to have an intervention for my nonexistence bulimia.”
“Yeah don’t. You’re yay.”
“To you. To me, I’m ugh.”
“Your brothers aren’t tough enough to punch your dates in the face. You’re more likely to punch their dates in the face.”
“Thank you?”
“But I want cheesy beans!”
“This tastes redundant.”
“I would like to be eating some pizza now.”
“Oh my god my sister is reading fanfiction.”
“Oh no. Better kill her.”
“I don’t know how to describe the badness.”
“Death… to the brain.”
“I’m internetting! Very serious business!”
“If I ever get really rich I'm gonna devote a couple grand (or more) to preparation for a major apocalyptic event. Zombies and shit like that.”
“Because let’s face it, I do put the sexy in dyslexic.”
“I could do something more people-oriented for my community service, but I don’t think I’ll go for that.”
“How to do community service without meeting people.”
“I should write a pamphlet.”
“I’ve been inventing Anti-Barney D&D spells like, “Wrath of God- banish all Barneys from the field” and "Work of the Devil" - Summon Barney to the field. All enemies suffer -10 to will saving throws.” And there’s also "Ultimate Frisbee: Target foe is hit by an Ultimate Frisbee and stunned for two turns".
“But sticky makes it fun!”
“It's a song by Berlin, being listened to by Ceri, covered by System of a Down.”
“...being translated to siobhan, being confuzzled by it, being a maker of random ass comments
All is as usual.”
“I would love to have red hair. Not from a bottle. But chocolate sauce… I would like it in a bottle… or all over that Urie dude.”
“Take pity on the slow typers, for theirs in the kingdom of the doodlepads… and etchasketch.”
“Kylie has seen the light.”
“The pretty green one? I like that light. It’s purty.”
“Any ego I fake I brutally murder afterward.”
“I’m giving blood Sunday.”
“Giving blood or drinking blood?”
“And then of course there’s Neil Bush.”
“Who?”
[about Ashlee Simpson on SNL] “Apparently she blamed her bassist, and her bassist blamed his bass."
And a few late-night adds:
"Emo is kosher."
"Sounded like two moose fucking hard .
"HOBOCORE!"
Title Source: “Run Mary Run” by the Sloppy Meateaters. Cool guys from Georgia, and yes, it is a sexual reference.
“All the cute guys are either gay, short, 25, or taken.”
“It doesn’t get any better.”
“Then I’m becoming a lesbian.”
“My nails match my underwear.”
“Lawn clippings: the ecologically reusable garnish less expensive than parsley.”
“The cranes are courting.”
“So they’re fucking?”
“No! You court before you fuck. Unlike you.”
“I will shoot you... like an old horse... and make you into glue.”
“Who wants pity from [her]? If you did, I’d shoot you like a lame horse. Then I’d sell your hooves to the glue factory and sell your body to the dog food factory.”
“It was the Eighties. Everyone looked the same. Just like in the Fifties.”
“Run! Annie’s an alien assault vector!”
[laughs] “Of cheerfulness?”
“Of cheerfulness which is actually Ebola that takes over your mind and makes it alien also with low frequency vibrations and black holes and then augments your body with machinery and makes you bisexual. There, I have summed up every issue of Warren Ellis' global frequency for you.”
“Three isn’t many and six isn’t convincing.”
“Meh-el! Save your planet!”
“Shut up. Don’t make fun of the blind dyslexic kid.”
“Aww, why not?”
“Because it’s not nice. But apparently my telepathy is getting better because you understood what I said.”
“Squirrel! Evil! Kill it!”
“No! Cute! Kill it!”
“When I get my own place, I’ll be able to play music and laugh as loud as I want without people being annoying.”
“That will rock”
“Literally.” … “Another thing about my own place: I can fucking sing in it.”
“So did you vomit?”
“No, but I still feel like I should. Except then people will try to have an intervention for my nonexistence bulimia.”
“Yeah don’t. You’re yay.”
“To you. To me, I’m ugh.”
“Your brothers aren’t tough enough to punch your dates in the face. You’re more likely to punch their dates in the face.”
“Thank you?”
“But I want cheesy beans!”
“This tastes redundant.”
“I would like to be eating some pizza now.”
“Oh my god my sister is reading fanfiction.”
“Oh no. Better kill her.”
“I don’t know how to describe the badness.”
“Death… to the brain.”
“I’m internetting! Very serious business!”
“If I ever get really rich I'm gonna devote a couple grand (or more) to preparation for a major apocalyptic event. Zombies and shit like that.”
“Because let’s face it, I do put the sexy in dyslexic.”
“I could do something more people-oriented for my community service, but I don’t think I’ll go for that.”
“How to do community service without meeting people.”
“I should write a pamphlet.”
“I’ve been inventing Anti-Barney D&D spells like, “Wrath of God- banish all Barneys from the field” and "Work of the Devil" - Summon Barney to the field. All enemies suffer -10 to will saving throws.” And there’s also "Ultimate Frisbee: Target foe is hit by an Ultimate Frisbee and stunned for two turns".
“But sticky makes it fun!”
“It's a song by Berlin, being listened to by Ceri, covered by System of a Down.”
“...being translated to siobhan, being confuzzled by it, being a maker of random ass comments
All is as usual.”
“I would love to have red hair. Not from a bottle. But chocolate sauce… I would like it in a bottle… or all over that Urie dude.”
“Take pity on the slow typers, for theirs in the kingdom of the doodlepads… and etchasketch.”
“Kylie has seen the light.”
“The pretty green one? I like that light. It’s purty.”
“Any ego I fake I brutally murder afterward.”
“I’m giving blood Sunday.”
“Giving blood or drinking blood?”
“And then of course there’s Neil Bush.”
“Who?”
[about Ashlee Simpson on SNL] “Apparently she blamed her bassist, and her bassist blamed his bass."
And a few late-night adds:
"Emo is kosher."
"Sounded like two moose fucking hard .
"HOBOCORE!"
11 August 2006
Oh, you write such pretty words, but life’s no storybook.
[Yawn] I think this is the earliest in the day I've updated. For every one of my seemingly insane actions, however, there be a reason. I'm going to the zoo in about half an hour for who-know-how-long and then later I'm going to see Clerks 2 with my mom. Yeah, I know my mom is awesome. But anyway... I keep yawning. Too much sleep.
Title Source: “Lover I Don’t Have To Love” by Bright Eyes. One of the first Bright Eyes songs I ever heard. Oh the romanticism of the twelve-year-old mind.
"Free ice cream is always good."
“You need something on this wall. A painting, or a poster. But not Johnny Depp because then you’d burn the food.”
“The things you see when you haven’t got your gun.”
“I thought I’d brush up on my acting.”
“Then you should practice dying. You’re very good at that.”
“I want some bloody tea, dammit.”
“Boil some water, prick your wrist, and make some bloody tea.”
“Done.”
“How is thy bloody tea?”
“Yummy.” [grins widely showing vampire teeth]
“Well that’s good—nourishing too, I bet.”
“I bet Criss Angel can sneeze with his eyes open. Mindfreak that, bitches!”
[laughing] “Is that Justin Timberlake? Why is he a taco?”
“Why are you eating a spoon?”
“…’Cause it’s tasty…”
“You are mega popular.”
“I am teh uber poplarz!”
“Apparently in the acting area, I’m good at dying.”
“Away message: eating, as disordered.”
“You should steal a bunch of solar panels from all those call boxes on the freeway and use them to heat it.”
“Is that how they work? I’ve always wondered.”
“Yeah, if look you can see a small solar panel at the top.”
“I was always too busy watching the power and phonelines dip up and down.”
“Steal enough and you can power your entire house and sell the extra electricity to PG&E.”
“They need to make solar panels cheaper. Then we wouldn’t have to steal them.”
“We’re out of milk.”
[laughs]
“Don’t laugh, I couldn’t have my blood tea. I mean bloody. Ah, who’m I kidding?”
“You should kill a milkman. You will feel better.”
“Iono, you just can’t look at that situation and say ‘He’s acting out.’”
“Well, you can, but you’d be a douchebag.”
“Oh my god! I think I’ve gained weight!”
“Musta been all those wagons you had for breakfast.”
“Salvation from what?”
“…I don’t want to talk about it. I’ll say, ickiness, and leave it at that.”
“If I commit a crime sometime soon, I can plead temporary insanity due to trauma with this as an excuse.”
“Yes! You should just commit a crime while you can.”
“I love it.”
“My dyslexia? You’re the only one.”
“Better than any other movie up there. Got 47 mil already.”
“That's because the masses are desperate, stupid, and like whatever Will Farrell does.”
“Yayayayayay Will Farrell. Except Bewitched.”
“Yeah well that was just a bad idea.”
“Kittens!”
[munch]
“Gasp! That was my snack!”
[offers other half to you]
“Aww. Thanks. I love the intestines.”
“Pirates make you hot, you know it.”
“Privates! I mean… pirates. Jesus, what a Freudian slip.”
“Yeah, those wagons go straight to your hips.”
“Liberace. Did he have a sister Mary? Mariachi?” [It got my whole family laughing.]
guy: your hair is gorgeous. it must smell nice too.
me: thanks
guy: what's your name?
me: angela
guy: do you have a boyfriend?
me: yeah, actually i do
guy: oh. he must be one lucky guy
me: yeah, i'll tell him you said that. [I’m such a liar, aren’t I?”
"Why the fuck is this unicorn so damn emo?"
"That's it? I wanted a story with ninjas!"
"Stupid attractive teenager on my couch."
"Who?"
"Alex."
"Alex curly hair Alex?"
"No, the male variety."
"Damn."
"Is it weird I think it's hot that he's reading comics?"
“Little girls taste like lamb chops.”
“People buy and sell suck crap on tv.”
“Life is a cruel bitch at times, and sometimes a fuzzy bunny.”
“Covered in barbed wire?”
“no, fuzzy bunnies covered in barbed wire are the only type worth having. Unless they are black and attached to Davey Havoc.”
“Hey at least his haircut makes a statement. It failed, but it was trying.”
“I WILL NOT BE RELEGATED TO VAMPIRE SLAYER JUST BECAUSE I HAPPEN TO BE SHORT BLOND AND QUIRKY!”
“Know what else is not all bad?”
“Ryan Ross?”
“Well that too. The Subways. Quite good.”
“Band or the underground train thingies?”
“Band.”
“Oh, because I like the underground train thingies.”
“Drunkards can throw even awesome vampires for a loop. BAC, you know.”
“Haha! Siobhan got hit on by a pirate!”
“Reading is a gateway to lesbianism and witchcraft.”
“Then burn me at the stake and find me a hot chick.”
“God I hate it when she doesn’t listen to me.”
“Who?”
“Joanna.”
“She smells like tacos.”
“Awww, you remembered!”
“That is inappropriate language for the candy shop!”
“Surfer boys smell like ocean… and Axe.”
“We sort’a have this love-hate relationship… well, more of a hate-toleration relationship.”
“I wish my house smelled like surfer boys.”
“I am soooo ool man.”
“Oh, you are the reason I turn into a lonely little emo kid.”
“Bev would be sad I didn’t have a Brendon Urie to pour my maple syrup on.”
“We all mourn that.”
“Should the presence of a higher power make you feel an tingly? And swirly?”
“I’m not sure how that started.”
“Well, you know, one thing leads to another and eventually you get to pouring syrup on hot guys.”
“So it's been decided that I’m a vampire, Mel's a werewolf, and Siobhan is a witch.”
“What am I? And why are you all what you are?”
“You're coffinbait. I am a vampire because of my aversion to sunlight, pointy canines, and corpse-pale skin.”
“Are you calling me a slut, Ceri?”
“'Fraid so, Kyliepants.”
“What pants?” [wink]
“The pants you're whoring yourself to get into.”
“That’s mean.”
“So am I. So is she. It all works out.”
“You should bang things. And I should video tape it.”
“Things like… what… exactly?”
“All up to you.”
[thinks for a moment before smiling evilly] “I don’t think you should tape that.”
“I have naked people in my head.”
Title Source: “Lover I Don’t Have To Love” by Bright Eyes. One of the first Bright Eyes songs I ever heard. Oh the romanticism of the twelve-year-old mind.
"Free ice cream is always good."
“You need something on this wall. A painting, or a poster. But not Johnny Depp because then you’d burn the food.”
“The things you see when you haven’t got your gun.”
“I thought I’d brush up on my acting.”
“Then you should practice dying. You’re very good at that.”
“I want some bloody tea, dammit.”
“Boil some water, prick your wrist, and make some bloody tea.”
“Done.”
“How is thy bloody tea?”
“Yummy.” [grins widely showing vampire teeth]
“Well that’s good—nourishing too, I bet.”
“I bet Criss Angel can sneeze with his eyes open. Mindfreak that, bitches!”
[laughing] “Is that Justin Timberlake? Why is he a taco?”
“Why are you eating a spoon?”
“…’Cause it’s tasty…”
“You are mega popular.”
“I am teh uber poplarz!”
“Apparently in the acting area, I’m good at dying.”
“Away message: eating, as disordered.”
“You should steal a bunch of solar panels from all those call boxes on the freeway and use them to heat it.”
“Is that how they work? I’ve always wondered.”
“Yeah, if look you can see a small solar panel at the top.”
“I was always too busy watching the power and phonelines dip up and down.”
“Steal enough and you can power your entire house and sell the extra electricity to PG&E.”
“They need to make solar panels cheaper. Then we wouldn’t have to steal them.”
“We’re out of milk.”
[laughs]
“Don’t laugh, I couldn’t have my blood tea. I mean bloody. Ah, who’m I kidding?”
“You should kill a milkman. You will feel better.”
“Iono, you just can’t look at that situation and say ‘He’s acting out.’”
“Well, you can, but you’d be a douchebag.”
“Oh my god! I think I’ve gained weight!”
“Musta been all those wagons you had for breakfast.”
“Salvation from what?”
“…I don’t want to talk about it. I’ll say, ickiness, and leave it at that.”
“If I commit a crime sometime soon, I can plead temporary insanity due to trauma with this as an excuse.”
“Yes! You should just commit a crime while you can.”
“I love it.”
“My dyslexia? You’re the only one.”
“Better than any other movie up there. Got 47 mil already.”
“That's because the masses are desperate, stupid, and like whatever Will Farrell does.”
“Yayayayayay Will Farrell. Except Bewitched.”
“Yeah well that was just a bad idea.”
“Kittens!”
[munch]
“Gasp! That was my snack!”
[offers other half to you]
“Aww. Thanks. I love the intestines.”
“Pirates make you hot, you know it.”
“Privates! I mean… pirates. Jesus, what a Freudian slip.”
“Yeah, those wagons go straight to your hips.”
“Liberace. Did he have a sister Mary? Mariachi?” [It got my whole family laughing.]
guy: your hair is gorgeous. it must smell nice too.
me: thanks
guy: what's your name?
me: angela
guy: do you have a boyfriend?
me: yeah, actually i do
guy: oh. he must be one lucky guy
me: yeah, i'll tell him you said that. [I’m such a liar, aren’t I?”
"Why the fuck is this unicorn so damn emo?"
"That's it? I wanted a story with ninjas!"
"Stupid attractive teenager on my couch."
"Who?"
"Alex."
"Alex curly hair Alex?"
"No, the male variety."
"Damn."
"Is it weird I think it's hot that he's reading comics?"
“Little girls taste like lamb chops.”
“People buy and sell suck crap on tv.”
“Life is a cruel bitch at times, and sometimes a fuzzy bunny.”
“Covered in barbed wire?”
“no, fuzzy bunnies covered in barbed wire are the only type worth having. Unless they are black and attached to Davey Havoc.”
“Hey at least his haircut makes a statement. It failed, but it was trying.”
“I WILL NOT BE RELEGATED TO VAMPIRE SLAYER JUST BECAUSE I HAPPEN TO BE SHORT BLOND AND QUIRKY!”
“Know what else is not all bad?”
“Ryan Ross?”
“Well that too. The Subways. Quite good.”
“Band or the underground train thingies?”
“Band.”
“Oh, because I like the underground train thingies.”
“Drunkards can throw even awesome vampires for a loop. BAC, you know.”
“Haha! Siobhan got hit on by a pirate!”
“Reading is a gateway to lesbianism and witchcraft.”
“Then burn me at the stake and find me a hot chick.”
“God I hate it when she doesn’t listen to me.”
“Who?”
“Joanna.”
“She smells like tacos.”
“Awww, you remembered!”
“That is inappropriate language for the candy shop!”
“Surfer boys smell like ocean… and Axe.”
“We sort’a have this love-hate relationship… well, more of a hate-toleration relationship.”
“I wish my house smelled like surfer boys.”
“I am soooo ool man.”
“Oh, you are the reason I turn into a lonely little emo kid.”
“Bev would be sad I didn’t have a Brendon Urie to pour my maple syrup on.”
“We all mourn that.”
“Should the presence of a higher power make you feel an tingly? And swirly?”
“I’m not sure how that started.”
“Well, you know, one thing leads to another and eventually you get to pouring syrup on hot guys.”
“So it's been decided that I’m a vampire, Mel's a werewolf, and Siobhan is a witch.”
“What am I? And why are you all what you are?”
“You're coffinbait. I am a vampire because of my aversion to sunlight, pointy canines, and corpse-pale skin.”
“Are you calling me a slut, Ceri?”
“'Fraid so, Kyliepants.”
“What pants?” [wink]
“The pants you're whoring yourself to get into.”
“That’s mean.”
“So am I. So is she. It all works out.”
“You should bang things. And I should video tape it.”
“Things like… what… exactly?”
“All up to you.”
[thinks for a moment before smiling evilly] “I don’t think you should tape that.”
“I have naked people in my head.”
10 August 2006
04 August 2006
It’s all out of context. Its nothing I’m into. Call it a complex. It’s really quite simple.
Early in the week, I got a comment on the last post from some anonymous cool-person (yes, it is hyphenated). To that person, be they reading this, I wish to say, You’re flipping rad, whoever you are. But let’s get on to this week. There are a couple good ones from Sunday afternoon: ice-skating and craziness in general. Not to mention more “your mom” jokes than you can shake a stick at. Some of these are actually really old because Sunday night my brother reinstalled AIM, which I haven’t used in months, and my profile was still up and had quotes. Nifty, huh? Comments, darlings, are always appreciated when read, whether they be positive or otherwise.
Title Source: “Callbacks” by We Are Scientists. They rock and make me want to dance. Buy it!
"Now, now. If we went around stabbity-stabbing all the stupid people, who would do our bidding?"
"Well, that's what I get for using demon-based paint."
"No, actually, I keep my soul in a toasty-warm pretty glass bottle where I can admire it."
“Why does she look dead?”
“It’s fashionable.”
“Oh yeah, I want to look like a corpse.”
“Hey, Lance Bass is gay. Like no one saw that coming. No straight guy has that kind of hair.”
“Stupid cars. Trying to run me over all the time.”
"It's so glittery."
"That's what she said.”
"You're so gay you're homophobic!"
“God! What the fuck is up with this bus! First it smells like feet, and then it smells like death, and then it smells like ass!”
"So you still have long hair and listen to heavy metal? Yeah... that's unattractive."
An example of my nerdiness: "Well, we're supposed to be playing D&D, but the n00bs are playing Warcraft."
"Idea! We should have a nerf gun fight at the zoo! But we might lose the darts... so never mind."
"We should use the animals as mounts."
"Why is it that every guy I know just about gets a hard on talking about Warcraft?"
"It isn't. It's a figment of you imagination. I hope."
"You hope I imagine guys having hard ons talking about video games... No thanks."
"It's not that violent, unless someone gets shot in the face, which is usually Gabriel."
"Those nerf dart fly fucking fast! Especially from a six-shooter."
"Things I've been doing for two days straight: knitting and reading comic books. Welcome to Dorkland."
"All is fair in love and Mexican stand-offs."
"You're not having sex. They're not having sex. They're still wearing clothes. Rookie mistake!"
“Boys have germs, girls have cooties, get it right!”
“I like my candy with a citrus base. Like my women. Wait…”
“Rivers Cuomo: The Emo Woody Allen”
“For some reason, whenever I think of Ville Valo, I think of pirates.”
“I know. Unfortunately I do too.”
“No un in the fortunate. Well… I mean… in fortUNate there’s an un, but no un prefix!”
“Loverrr.”
[looks around] “Wrong number?”
Title Source: “Callbacks” by We Are Scientists. They rock and make me want to dance. Buy it!
"Now, now. If we went around stabbity-stabbing all the stupid people, who would do our bidding?"
"Well, that's what I get for using demon-based paint."
"No, actually, I keep my soul in a toasty-warm pretty glass bottle where I can admire it."
“Why does she look dead?”
“It’s fashionable.”
“Oh yeah, I want to look like a corpse.”
“Hey, Lance Bass is gay. Like no one saw that coming. No straight guy has that kind of hair.”
“Stupid cars. Trying to run me over all the time.”
"It's so glittery."
"That's what she said.”
"You're so gay you're homophobic!"
“God! What the fuck is up with this bus! First it smells like feet, and then it smells like death, and then it smells like ass!”
"So you still have long hair and listen to heavy metal? Yeah... that's unattractive."
An example of my nerdiness: "Well, we're supposed to be playing D&D, but the n00bs are playing Warcraft."
"Idea! We should have a nerf gun fight at the zoo! But we might lose the darts... so never mind."
"We should use the animals as mounts."
"Why is it that every guy I know just about gets a hard on talking about Warcraft?"
"It isn't. It's a figment of you imagination. I hope."
"You hope I imagine guys having hard ons talking about video games... No thanks."
"It's not that violent, unless someone gets shot in the face, which is usually Gabriel."
"Those nerf dart fly fucking fast! Especially from a six-shooter."
"Things I've been doing for two days straight: knitting and reading comic books. Welcome to Dorkland."
"All is fair in love and Mexican stand-offs."
"You're not having sex. They're not having sex. They're still wearing clothes. Rookie mistake!"
“Boys have germs, girls have cooties, get it right!”
“I like my candy with a citrus base. Like my women. Wait…”
“Rivers Cuomo: The Emo Woody Allen”
“For some reason, whenever I think of Ville Valo, I think of pirates.”
“I know. Unfortunately I do too.”
“No un in the fortunate. Well… I mean… in fortUNate there’s an un, but no un prefix!”
“Loverrr.”
[looks around] “Wrong number?”
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