I want to get a mohawk, but Mom won't let me get one.

That's a lie. I couldn't pull off a mohawk. It was just the first lyric that came to mind. But anyway.

It's very strange to look at the mile-long scroll of html code for this site and understand what have of it does. Yeah, I've been checking it out, just for my own purposes.

"Excitement is waking up everyday."
"I'm still here!"

That was my mom and her friend two seconds ago. Just thought you might enjoy that.


This is Margot & The Nuclear So and So's. They make good music. You should listen to it. This is rather Sumner-ish, isn't it? Telling people what music to listen to? Oh well. I think it was an implied thing, telling you all what song the titles were from.

Huh. I'm actually blogging. Go figure. My fingers are cold. I think I've been at the computer too long. Not that that's going to stop me.

When I woke my body was dyin all over the floor

Today was über fun, kids. Hanging out is always fun. But anyways, this week's been lame with a captial la, and next week isn't looking too good either, despite retreat on Mon/Tuesday and SIL on Friday. I order all you minions to go see it and laugh and be stupefied by how cool we all are. Oh yeah.

Title Source: "Quiet As A Mouse" by Margot & The Nuclear So and So's. Cool name, even cooler album. ^It's an interesting image, isn't it?


“Well, the only reason I’d get a girlfriend is so you can make fun of me.”

“So in summary: Ceri knows nothing and Sumner has no penis?”
“People think I know nothing, but I know stuff. And yes.”
“You are teh smart!”

“If I lose my mind and actually be in a band with Aly, and she makes me plays any Fall Out Boy at all, please hit me and help me kill her.”

“Why would someone be dumb enough to do a classical cover of Fall Out Boy?”
“What the Christ? That is like mental retardation.”

“Aww, how cute, a secret admirer.”
“Yeah, stalker-cute.”

“Don't make fun of my not being able to spell, Mister Miller. Otherwise I'll take back my promise and make fun of your future-having-a-girlfriend-ed-ness.”

“This insane librarian at the library today was telling some story in the kids section about how some guy accidentally gave the library back his porno DVD instead of the DVD it was supposed to be.”

“Man, I feel burdened as the couple of sexual jokes. Can’t someone start going out so you can make fun of them?”

“Your face. And you can’t dance for shit.”

“Drummers are sometimes really fucking ugly.”
“Well I'm not talking about your weird metal bands Ceri”
“Like that guy in yesterday's news”
“MY weird metal bands? And shut up, Scott.”

“I see white people.”
“No, you don’t. Ever.”

“Hey, that’s better than me tonight. So far I’ve been penis-less and ignored.”

“What are your views on cheap prostitution? I think it helps build a unified America.”

“Oh man. Just an ugly family. I wonder if they were ugly babies too.”

SIT= sluts in training

“Fucking libertarian crypto hacker.”

“Fine, you can be an honorary whore.”

“Oh eight is Ho eight!”

“Andy Ragni has a crush on Scott?”
“That’s pretty interesting seeing as they’ve never met.”

“Chris is dating a really hot guy. Apparently, face-meltingly so.”

“No couple-arguing in the chat.”

“Wow SI is gansta.”

“Hey, Davey Havoc did the emo hair before there was even emo.”

“God. He’s such a drag queen.”

“Adam.”
“Ceri.”
“Sphincter.”
“Vaginal intercourse. I win.”

“They can all have their own life. I’m not limiting them.”
“I am.”

“If a vampire is draining someone and they start laughing, will blood come out their nose? And if so, whose blood?”

“My mom heard an interview with Keith Richards and he said he’s giving up drugs!”
“Yeah, he’s a goner.”

“Another band I can’t tell if it’s good or terrible. Jamison Parker. Jamison Covington is hot though. And has a killer name.”

“He’s a little whiny.”
“Like the hair?”
“Yes.”

“Oh? I await with peeled potatoes to hear your offensive chorus of stinging opinion.”
“Peeled potatoes, Kylie?”
“I'm hungry.”

“Death to the monkeys.”
“Completely.”
“And absolutely.”

“Are you doing homework?”
“…Yes.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you do anything but homework.”
“Don’t make fun of me because I do my homework.”

“I see flying bananas.”
“I see flying bandanas. Zero potassium. High in cotton, though I’m not sure it’s nutritional value. Maybe it makes your insides all soft and cushiony.”

“Ceri.”
“Sumner.”
“Life?”
“No.”

“Damn you evil scrunchie of doom!”

“Jesse Helms and Newt Gingrich were shaking hands congratulating themselves on the introduction of an antigay bill in Congress. If it passes, they won't be able to shake hands, because it will then be illegal for a prick to touch an asshole.”

“Emo kids are interesting people to watch.”
“I’ll bet. Like lava lamps.”

“You’re not doing anything… but you’re preoccupied… what, are you looking at porn?”

“Sphincters make everything better.”
“Correct. But what rhymes with sphincter? To the rhyming dictionary!”

“The truth is, it’s my sadistic side: I like to watch them squirm and squeal.”

“Well tell her she's full of potassium! Which does a body good.”

“Sorry. She thinks she's funny a lot. I mean not that she isn't. But sometimes it’s childish... I guess that’s the right word”
“Get your foot out of your mouth kid”
“Huh?”
“You’ve never heard that phrase?”
“I have. Just never understood what it meant.”
“Yeah, it's basically what you just did.”

“Jin.”
“Like fin, only more musical and less emo.”

“We're gonna make a cult that does interpretative dance to tribal music and take over the country.”
“I wanna help!”

“Silly Annie. Trix are for kids. Seriously I'm waiting for that rabbit to crack and then go on a killing rampage and be like, ‘Who's silly now, beeyatch!’ Like ‘You look awful silly with my foot in your face’ and then he round house kicks them.”

“Hopefully Panic! will have to cancel again and reschedule… They won’t.”
“Maybe they will. Get the chloroform.”
“If I get the chloroform, you’ll have to call the police. Because there’s a famous band tied up in my basement.”

“Let’s make a band called the Naked Animal Collective.”
“That would be the ultimate indie band.”

“Plastic is the national… anthem, what?”

“Sumner! No gymnastic abuse!”

“I don’t think our age are supposed to understand life. If they say they do, they’re either stupid and lying or fooling themselves.”

“You’re not appetizing covered in pesto.”
“To a cannibal I am.” [Coincidentally, Gabriel is a cannibal.]

“No. I don’t feed people who jingle.”

“Everyone’s an alcoholic. They just haven’t drunk enough yet.”

“If you plant an acorn, it has the potential to be an oak tree. If you plant a baby…” There is no end of that sentence.

“Stop staring at the hot guy.”
“Wow. I can’t even debate that.”

“Awesome for the music. Not so awesome for the college.”

This I must remember when the sirens call to me.

Well that was the first time I was late for a post. Oh well. It's not like anyone cares. Okay, um... go SI football? Yeah. And yes, we are a Midwest high school, Jack. After the football game we all go down to the burger joint and sit in the back of our friend's truck, listening to tunes. Damn straight.

Title Source: "Calling" by Tiger Army. Surprisingly good band.


“What would be an appropriate age?”
“For groping manikins? With or without it being overtly hilarious?”

“You being twins with anyone?”
“Nope. I have enough alternative-reality me’s in my head.”
“Haha. You know I meant for the theme.”
“I know, but I was serious.”

“Man, I wish my personality were a word document uploadable into my identity. That way I could rewrite it.”
“And you could give yourself awesome powers.”
“Exactly!”

“No stabbing in restaurants!”

“New Jersey is lame.”
“I was born in New Jersey.”
“New Jersey is LAME.”

“Kyo’s cute in a ‘I wanna rub your tummy and play with you’ kind of way.”
“Well so’s Davey [Havoc].”

“What’s the difference between Sunday and Monday?”
“Twenty-four hours and three letters.”

“The separation of Ceri and Annie is needed for the growth of a secular society!”

“It’s days like today that make me want to take up kickboxing.”

"If we don't eat the irreversibly comatose, we shouldn't eat chickens."

“I look like a milkmaid.”
“Got cookies? I know you do…”

“And bandanas don’t have potassium.”

“Felattio [fel-at-tee-o] is a language. It’s a romance language.”

“Write that down!”
“What, that beanie babies don’t have souls?”

“You can smack me.”
“Andre, that’s a little creepy.”

“For sale: one wife. Slightly used.”

“I like my viruses like I like my women… with viruses!”

“They have something other than Mormons in Utah?”

“Keep your gentleman bits under wraps.”

“Tight pants + commando = NO.”

“Hey. Anything is a dance song is you dances.”

“You’re smarter than a zucchini.”

“Goodnight and farewell to shleepibyes.”

“Shame on you for not knowing what pudding is!”

“I like epic nothing.”

“Can I turn around now?”
“That’s what she said.”

“Yes, Holyfuck Green is now a colour.”

“…Were you just speaking Cantonese?”

“You know, if I didn’t hate people so much, I’d make a good secretary.”

"Our arguements are kind of like a heart right before someone dies in the hospital: the rate goes up and up and up until it just flatlines." [A good analogy, no?]

EMOFINE!

Oh, oh goddammit, I think i've lost it.

I say a lot of dumb things. My friends say a lot of dumb things. Most people probably think my inner hair colour is blonde. Part of me wants to go Johnny the Homicidal Maniac on these people. If you've never heard of Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, you're probably better off. Speaking of comics, go read Questionable Content. I've read 600+ strips in a day and a half. My eyes hurts.

Title Source: "Oh Goddammit" by Hot Hot Heat. Guess who forgot to find a title.

"Your pit got moshed"

"Mmm... homoerotic. My favourite cereal!"

"'Do you want Cheerio’s?' 'No, I want Cheeri-ho's!'"

"Leave this. Look at my ass."

[shouted at top of lungs] "I like jam! Especially strawberry!" [Yelling random things, whether in the corridors or at concerts, is SO fun.]

"this is like 'Where's Waldo?' only way fucking harder."

"Jade is god. one of many."

"Davey Havoc is like Jesus walking on water, only on people."

"Jesus was badass when he was a kid."

"Anything else, hos?"

“I think I’m wearing more of other people’s sweat than my own.”

“+6 for sheer irony.”

“You rock my socks!”
“You rock my shoelaces!”
“You rock EVERYTHING!”

“Do you know any drummers?”
“Yes.”
“Who aren’t in bands?”
“…Damn, err, no.”

“…I think Warcraft is a conspiracy.”

“Those hippos are always up to something.”

“Rack this one up on the list of songs someone will never write about me.”

“Clearly I have inhaled too much smoke. I hear colours.”

“In a way, I want to shoot whoever wrote this song.”

“Wait. Buttsex is the sum of all real numbers?”

“Yeah, Jack went through a douche.”

“I miss Scott. He was moderately sane.”
“Yeah.” [sad face]
“That’s really sad.”

“One of you can’t type, one of you uses exclamation points, and one of you has singing orgasms. I’ll leave it to you to figure out which.”

“Actually, and I read this, AFI stands for Giant death trolls preying on small French Children.”

“Jack, stop listening to yourself play.”

“Who got Taoism?”
“I don’t know. I don’t care. They probably deserved it.”

“Emo Mike Cereal; warning: may cause depression, high blood pressure, and a strong urge to write bad poetry.”
“And the urge to save girls from mosh pits.”

“Well, you’re a pirate.”
“So? Least I’m a sexy pirate.”

“So I'm almost-cool ‘cos I want to, but I’m not fully cool cuz I prefer to erg within an inch of my life than to hang with cool people.”

“Nothing like your parents talking about money to kill a good mood.”

“Well, too bad math teachers are so attracted to each other, rather than teachers and presidents of huge businesses.”

“Do you think Andre would believe me if I said impotent means you don't smell bad?”
“Maybe. Why?”
“Same old same old. Your dad wanted to skewer his head with a javelin- questions.”

[burp] “Wow.”
“That’s what she said.”

“Hey, can you get up?”
“Your mom got up last night… but then she got back down.”

“I love the subliminal scary faces.”
“Didn’t see those!”
“That’s what you want you to think.”

“Watching you die is always entertaining. I mean that in the nicest way.”

“Satan? Oh, it’s just you, Ceri.”

“Yes, Annie. Omg you dead.”

“Dude.”
“That’s me.”

“Are you on E or something? Like, conversation E?”

“You know what's funny? Imagine a hobag. Now imagine a hoe. Now imagine a bag. Now imagine a hoe with a bag on the end. It looks like a giant penis. Basically.”

“Feh. He ran away. Probably due to my +9 WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION!”
“You’re a dork, Ian.”

“I’m not geeky. I’m multi-classes geek.”

“Shut your sarcasm hole, Indie McEmopants. It was no such thing.”

“I mean, if MY boyfriend [coughcompletelyhypotheticalnevergoingtohappencough] said his heart hurts, in a completely not metaphorical emo way, I wouldn't rush him off to the doctor. Nope, not at all.”

“I love my guitar. Like, seriously LOVE it.”
“Then why don’t you MARRY it?!”
“Maybe I will.”
“Okay cool.”

“You’re invited to the wedding. It’s in December.”
“Okay. Wow guess what. For a minute I thought there was an actual wedding I was invited to. I got excited. But then… No.”

“Your liar liar pants on fire is showing again.”

“You're not. You're a lying candywhore. The candy is the most important part. And in front of that there's an invisible ‘adorable, highly-amusing’.”

“Ozma is pretty perky is you don’t listen to the lyrics.”

“Operation: get peeps to hang out during dance time is now go. You have your orders. Good luck agent.”

“Oh, and I’m sorry I chucked a Clifbar at you earlier and hit you in the face.”

“Hip gyration=AFI. Or Davey Havoc anyway.”

“I would suggest she and I start a club, but people would nickname it the emo club, so no.”

“Your emosity paired with the overwhelming want to beat the shit out of something/ experience serious bodily harm makes for an interesting combination.”

“No, I’m most definitely loony. And this make me undateable because I offer up the crazy hot and piping fresh when people meet me.”

“I dunno why, but sarcastic people usually have an accurate view of the world and people.”

“English papers suck… and who DOES check if nuns wear underwear?”
“God.”

“There’s a fine line between dumb and evil.”

“Melissa likes manwiches.”
“No, she likes men…covered in bread.”

“I can see KQ walking around with a human protractor. His brain is a human protractor.”

“Can you say quoted!”
“…No.”
“I can! ‘Quoted’!”

“I just realised you’re not as funny as I thought you were.”

“Don’t think about me when people are licking you!”

“I have only two first cousins.”
“But one of them doesn’t count because he’s a meth head.”
[laughs] “Oh, that is alarmingly close to the truth.”

“You got breasts X-rayed all over your jacket!”

“By Jove! It’s a boob!”

Things I did today (all true):
-went to school
-yelled random stuff in the halls
-walked 11 blocks to lunch
-threatened several lives in disturbingly amusing ways
-got stared at by an emo kid
-got checked out by construction workers
-fell victim to the superstition of the first to leave a table of 13 will die [But as you can see, I'm alive. Let's not hope for a car wreck.]
-passed out in the car
-came home to a yellow motorcycle in my driveway [I love Alex's bike.]
-was surprised when Gabriel and Emily appeared at my house with no one else here.

I'm about as close to making sense as I'm ever going to get.

Hey, woah. Post on a Sunday! Well, after last night I think everyone deserves to hear the story. The AFI concert was flipping AWESOME. I got the biggest chills when they came on, and the lights were moving over all the people, and I thought, "I want to do this. THIS is exactly what I want to do." But besides that little ditty, it's easiest to explain with the damage control.

Mel: bruised, swollen knee, kick to head, kick to face, stepped on, had to humiliating hold ceri's hand like a child, ate ceri's hair

Siobhan: kick to back of the skull, crazy bruise thing on arm, bruises on shins, walked over in middle of mosh pit [emo mike enters], face used as pushboard for crowd surfing, compressed with two other people into 1-foot square, lost periferal vision, smelled like pot and beer for at least half an hour, cut due to desimated bra, separated from group, hearing reduced to echo in left ear, disalined back
http://www.blogger.com/img/gl.link.gif
Ceri: kick to head, head used as landing by crowdsurfer, bruise on left elbow, had to deal with Mel the N00b for two hours, lost left shoe in pit twice, had to walk shoeless for a while, humiliation due to informing two girl I'm their boyfriend, crushed foot, bruise on lower back, probably bruises everywhere, got belt caught on other girl's pants, friction burn from other people and necklace chain, possibly broken toe

all: crushed, smushed, moshed, deafened, muted, drenched, molested, covered in more people's sweat than our own, hair yanked constantly


Mosh pits are crazy... and so very fun... so long as you aren't five feet tall. Sorry Mel.

Shabangbang also wanted me to post an apology for misspelling her name. So yeah... but for ever more hilarity which I HIGHLY encourage you to read, read this.

http://www.quizilla.com/users/TheAntihero/quizzes/The%20Best%20%5BEmo%5D%20Story%20Ever/

Lean against the night and laugh/ As I try to scale the wall/ Ignored futility fills the air/ You're only there to watch me fall

I'm so freakin' excited about tomorrow. Shebangbang, Mel, and I are going to see AFI at Bill Graham. It's gonna rock. Today was pretty awesome too: got out before noon and hung out with peeps. Tres cool, and I'm not talking about the drummer.

Title Source: "Clove Smoke Cartharsis" by AFI. They'll never play this song.


[looks at Mom ironing purificators (church thingies)] “Oh God, I remember those.”

“Yayayayayay! Lemme Czech.”

“I do believe I just saw a faerie.”
“What kind?”
“The long, thin, white floaty kind.”

“My brother just now: ‘I feel like a bean. A small white bean.’ Fucking addict. Crack anyone?”

“Re ‘Brandon Flowers has a Burt Reynolds mustache.’: The only proper response is ‘No, Burt Reynolds has a Brandon Flowers mustache’.”

Sumner: “Hey, can I have Annie’s cell number? I don’t have my phone.”
Ceri: [dies laughing]
Sumner: Cmon, cmon.
Ceri: [gives Annie’s number] Do you have any idea how hilariously sad that is?”

“Wow. Maybe I’m secretly Canadian.”

“On that note– C sharp minor– I’m off to bed.”

“Who do I hate more than anyone else in the world? Well, besides Kate Moss.”

“I had a dream that you and your brother volunteered to be martyrs.”
“Why would we do that?”

“Why am I everyone’s fucking boyfriend?!”

“Stupid conscience. Always getting in my way.”

“What else would you expect a teenager to be out doing at 9:30?”
“Clubbing? Whoring? Coke? Pot? Vodka? Heroin? All of the above?”

“I need so much brainwashing in that department.”

“Why? Because hanging out is rad.”
“Sliff.”
“Clever.”
“I am… bic pentameter.”

“We need to see Panic! in December.”
“Who’s bringing the maple syrup?”

“Why not? It was so fun. Except for the pornographic part.”

“Are you naturally this way or do you have help?”

“You know you have weird friends when you’re talking to one of them and can’t figure out whether they’re high or just being more eccentric than usual.”

“Why would someone be so evil as to deprive you of waffles?”

Define anxiety: realizing that your Physics teacher failed Arithmatic 101.

“I hate declining things a lot.”

“Your questions make Jesus cry.”

“He’s telling you to assrape the baby!”

“What day is it?”
“October.”

“Shut up! You and your logic. It’s the… work of… the devil.”

“Pirates of the Caribbean Cereal: Free pirate with proof of purchase. Pegleg not included.”

“Is she telling us to be lesbians?”

[burp] “Blue!”
“Seven!”

“Adam, stop molesting the panties!”

"Touch my hair and I will bite off your fingers and eat them!"

And my personal favourite:

“Come hither, fair strumpet. That means you, Ian.”

Sure we'll die young. All the greats do.

It seems like this week has lasted forever. Doing everything after three months of doing nothing tends to do that. Sunday was so much fun, guys, and I look forward to that video, Banana. I probably missed some good quotes today, but I bought a CD, so it's all good.

Title Source: "Die Young" by River City Rebels. ~For those who touched my life, thank you and I love you so.~


“The sun never sets on being badass.”

“Spliggity.”
“...spliggity?”
“Why not? It’s like ham cheese and waffles, watching porn, with all there syrup and grease; the sound it makes when it blarges together when they have sex. Spliggity.”
“...Um. Right.”
“Made sense in my mind.”
“I'm sure it did.”

“You dig? Like whipped cream gushing into a toilet. Wait, no.”
“Wait, what? That does not make sense.”
“That is supposed to mean exactly what it said. No symbols or hidden meanings.”

“Jesus wanted me to go commando.”

“Because the devil wears panties. Not Prada.”

“You know what’s fun? Watching Mormon people on caffeine.”

“How many fingers am I holding up?”
“The Asian ones.”

“I’m becoming a psychologically ‘fascinating’ person, but I want to be a well-balanced breakfast. I mean person.”
[laughs] “Oh, you and your breakfast cereal jokes. They’re grrrrrrreat!”

“I also like to point out the obvious in conversations like these.”
“Obviously.”
“…See!?”

“Wow I'm so cool. I'm a techie Mac lover rocker ghetto as mofo sexy diva chick from Cali.”

“It’s gotta happen. Everything happens once.”

“It’s like winter’s breath on your face.”
“Only in August.”

“It’s only figurative rape.”

“Well, fuck them.”
“With a rusty pipe!”

“You guys are like my Vicodin. Makes me drowsy and forget the pain.”
“Hey!”
“Drowsy in a good way. Like taking ecstasy drowsy. Why am I making all these drug references?”

“It’s just a third degree burn, but whatevs.”

“Brandon Flowers has a Burt Reynolds mustache.”

“Lots of people don’t like them, but I love them.”
“What, bombs?”

“What homework did I not do?”
“The eternal question.”

“You smell like camp!”

“You’re a morally bad dog!”

“Why does P Diddy need a spokesperson?”
“Because he’s fucking rich. Or maybe he’s sick or something.”
“Maybe he became a mime, that'd be awesome and save us from lots of pain. Not the fun kind of mime, the creepy I’ll beat the crap out of you and fuck ya ho's, kind of mime.”

“My mom has smoked cigars.”

“Man, I used to like Fergie. Now she’s a hip hop whore.”

“Oh, and the best thing I heard was that they’re coming out with Fall Out Boy dolls. Can anyone say pre-made voodoo dolls?”

“yeah, its a shame that they can't change their music, fans, Aly, and everything. That’d be nice.”
“So basically, not be Fall Out Boy?”
“Yes.”

“What was with the high-pitched voice? Did Justin Timberlake become a eunuch?”
“Yes. Yes, he is.”

“Did they say Axel Rose? Why the fuck is Axel Rose there?”

“Pyro!”
“Flame retardant suit.”

“Eminem hasn’t done shit recently.”
“There is a god!”

“Lou Reed in singing with the Raconteurs.”
“That’s weird.”

“I have no fucking clue. Jack White is attractive in a strange way.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean. In that strange way, he really is.”

“I beg to differ. She’s bringing sexy back?”
“Nope, because Ryan Ross already did that.”
“Yes he did. But don’t forget about Ville Valo. And he was around before Ryan, but Ryan reaffirmed it in the last year.”

James Blunt: “And I’ll race you to the bar!”

“its what V would do if he was standing up for copper instead of humanity. Hence the masks.”

“I have a secret. I’m secretly in the gangsta closet. And I love Taboo from the Black Eyed Peas.”

“Frolicking, fornicating, same thing.”


And I would like to now be a dork and ask that you either email me or comment telling me what you think this means:

“Hey, can I poke your butter?”