Yeah, you're pretty good-lookin'... for a girl.

Oh my god! I just saw My Chemical Romance last night and now I'm going to see the Matches at Slim's! Could this week get any better?

Title Source: "Pretty Good Looking for a Girl" by The White Stripes. First song that popped into my head.


“Butter. That’s what I use for condoms.”

“Brain fluid cake!”

“Can’t argue with quotes. Always great.”

“Punching people in the head just hurts. Unless you’re drunk.”
“Drunk people don’t feel pain!”

“Don’t step on my hair.”
“He’s not stepping. He’s standing.”
“Don’t stand on my stomach.”
“I’m not standing; I’m stepping!”

“Pretty much. Oh well. Fate wins this round of poker with my life.”
“Poker.” [snicker]

“I can’t picture him being a pedophile.”

“You’re like Mary, and you’ve been turned out of the inn, so go have your baby in a haystack.”
“Go find your Bethlehem!”

“How would you feel if you were in Iraq and George Bush took a nap on the couch? I’d be fucking pissed.”
“And it’s not even his couch. It’s Justin’s couch!”

“Would you leave the sex in the fountain alone?!”

“That’s gross.”
“That’s art. Get over it.”

“Think about it. Would you want a bunch of obese koalas hanging around your house?”

“This just in: the internet has run out of space.”
“We attempted to delete all the porn sites, but there was a huge outcry from white, aged men.”

“Why are you smelling Dan’s neck?”
“It smells like cherry!”

“Dan’s neck, Ceri’s tongue, he’s just on a roll today.”

“The Black Plague is back… in style.”

“Well, we have the short version of Livy.”
“Sparknotes saves the world again.”

“Hey, if he pulls a demon out of you, can I have it?”

“Did you know a sneeze in an eighth of an orgasm, so if you sneeze eight times in rapid succession, you’ll cum?”
“…I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“Auschwitz was a theme park gone wrong!”

“Well, who would you rather see? The Matches or MC… oh, Danny, right.”

“Why is that baby grey?”

“Oh shit, I’ve been voted off the island!”

“Is this yours? You don’t strike me as the headband type o’ gal.”
“No, more head bang.”